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Animal (Full) House

Twas a Traditional May Sausage Party at the poker table after a few weeks off.

The definition of a classic poker game was played with nine seats filled. No team win total, no goofy chaos rules, just standard gentlemanly cards. With our usual heavy hitters a no show this evening, it was up to Chris Black to take the mantel of dominator, and he made Rob his unwilling gimp. After beating him not once, not twice, but thrice with some just to out of reach hands, Rob took his punishment, said thank you Sir Black, and essentially financed the table for the evening (with a little help from Matt Vass).

There were a few other noteworthy moments, with Martin seizing the win total and Brady narrowly, then slightly more than narrowly making money. Plus the comeback of the year award has to go to Matt Lawrence who saw nothing but red the first hour and then slowly but strategically found his way to chip leader, if you don't count Martin's win total money, which I never do because this blog's opinion has always been the win total is dumb.

What wasn't dumb was the counts for nothing but is a blast everyone all-in fiasco between Chris and Martin, which lasted like forty years. The only two people to actual attend the Rickman wedding spent a double digits worth of hands going back and fourth until Chris walked away victorious. A victory that means nothing, but also means EVERYTHING!

Not poker related but also not not poker related, Chris shared his "mnemonic device" for remembering poker hand rankings. I'm literally quoting "You take a poop, then you have a full house, and you flush it straight down the toilet. And that, my good dudes, is poker!". That's it guys, so if you ever lose a hand, it's on you.

Outside the realm of poker we praised the works of David Lynch, both feature length and fifteen minutes of wasting Netflix money. We also gave mild props to both Succession and Guardians 3, at least the few folks at the table who had seen either.

We also listed our least favorite actors, with Chris not giving any great reason for furiously hating Laura Linney and Brady and Martin giving some pretty solid evidence for not enjoying Eddie Redmayne. The most continuous performer, however, turned out to be Kevin Costner. At some point he probably was good, and that point was likely May 5th, 1989, when the film Field of Dreams was released. But the decades and dye jobs have not been kind to the Cos, who has somehow grumped his way into being the thumbs down actor of the 2000s.

In happier news, most folks at the table have been thoroughly enjoying the recent Zelda game. So much so in fact that one could argue a "foot and mouth sickness" might be a flimsy excuse to have chosen Hyrule over the poker table for the last couple of weeks.

Jen, wife of the table, won a pickle ball set at trivia. Congrats Jen, hope this fills the airplane noise hole in your life just a bit.

Chip Leader: Matt Lawrence

Check City Champ: Rob

Honorary Fabelman of the Month: Martin

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